I want to remember everything about this last year, the feelings I have felt, the strength I have gained and the experiences I have witnessed of having a guardian angel, so here are a few questions I have asked myself:
What is the hardest part about this last year: Obviously just not having dad "there" I miss coming home and being wrapped up in his arms when I would walk through the door, or hearing him say "sure love ya!" Or I hate the moments where I come to a situation and think to myself, "I'll just ask dad" but then the heartache of his loss sets in and I go through the motions of grieving once again.
What has been your best experience: It never fails that every time I go to the temple I feel dads presence. Whether it be for 15 seconds of several minutes. It is an indescribable feeling, but you just know he is right there with you. The temple is where I feel the closest to dad and it gives me chills knowing that he walks those halls.
In what ways have I been blessed by our Guarding Angel: In what ways haven't I been blessed?! I see dad's hand in every aspect of my life! He leads and guides me to every single good thing that has happened to me since his passing. In times where Jerry and I should have been struggling financially dad always finds a way to help us out and makes our ends meet. For example, there is no way Jerry I and should have been able to afford our new apartment. With him being in school full time and not being able to work there was just no way; but sure enough a week before moving in I was given a raise at work, and it was just enough of a raise to cover the extra cost of our apartment! Tell me that is not Heaven inspired!! He knows my personal struggles and is always helping me bare the burden until the storm passes.
What do I miss most about Dad: I miss dads distinct laugh, his thunderous cough, his sneeze you could hear for miles, the way he would eat his cereal, walking through the door and seeing him hugging the couch while snoozing, how he would wear the same clothes 2 days in a row, his "puff" vest, his contagious smile, his caring nature, how he would take an hour at the grocery store because he would talk to the whole town, his love of the gospel, and his Christ-like example.
We are beyond blessed to have had this elect man as our father, I can't wait to have a perfect knowledge of his heavenly mission and why it is he had to pass so early. I can attest to each of you, my family, that Heavenly Father is so aware of each of us, and our feelings. He loves us so he sent his son, who would have a perfect knowledge of how we have felt while this huge void is present. He has not forgotten us; that is why he sends our father, or rather our angel, to watch over us and guide us. How blessed we are with the knowledge of the gospel, and the plan of salvation. We are a forever family, and I know that dad is waiting with open arms to welcome us home once our short earth time has passed. Lets not dwell on what we have lost this past year, but what we have gained. We are BLESSED trials to help us grow and to further build our faith in Christ. I know each of our testimonies have grown immensely from this tragic event, and I am so proud to call you all my family! Forever and always we are eternal!!!
Love and miss you daddio, Happy 1 year graduation into the eternities, I hope they are partying big for you!!!
Love, your baby girl Kenzie
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